 |
| The day when I arrived. |
 |
| The day when I left. |
Did you notice the difference though? We are the same in general, but the
It is absolutely upset to realize that the time you left for a place is limited. What makes people even more wistful is that you will somehow start to be aware of the approaching ending.
Those are the photo I took in Montreal in memory of the arrival and the ending respectively. I guess they can reflect the perception I have about leaving.
I just cannot believe that time can fly so fast that you don't even know things are changing. Or even worse, you notice that you've changed or not. How can it be possible though that the worse scenario include two disparate mindsets? Probably due to the nature of human -- greediness.
I guess people usually ask themselves about their lives or some metaphysical questions and then are muddled all the time. Thus, we are always getting more conscious of who we are and what we are doing.
It's just equally fascinating to notice that you are not excluded from this whole kind of ridiculous system.
About one or two weeks ago, one of my friend asked me about the experience of being in the USA as an exchange student. She was confused and indecisive about whether she should take the chance to study abroad as well. The answer was a yes without a doubt. I thought about the words she told me, which reminded me of the past of me. I was the wishy-washy girl before. I literally wrote the wish that I hope people don't forget about me on the lantern before I left. I was afraid that things would change and the disconnection would get worse. But now while I am looking at myself, the weakness is gone somehow. It's not because I don't care anymore, but more like I view this so-called connection the other way around.
I used to be sorrowful about being cold-blooded since I thought that I couldn't feel anything anymore. I was wrong obviously. I probably just have a higher tolerance of being alone. This can actually be expanded in many ways. The most influential part for myself is probably being less fearful...
So What exactly are the changes on me...?
They are probably countless and even ineffable.
They are happening every moment and I embrace that.
The Postal Service - We Will Become Silhouettes
Hsia 2015/4/09
沒有留言:
張貼留言